The Fine Art of Living

"I beleive that we learn by practice. Whether it means to learn to dance by practicing dancing or learn to live by practicing living, the principles are the same. In each, it is the performance of a dedicated precise set of acts, physical or intellectual, from which comes shape of achievement, a sense of one's being, a satisfaction of spirit. One becomes, in some area, an athlete of God. Practice means to perform, over and over again in the face of all obstacles, some act of vision, of faith, or desire. Practice is a means of inviting the perfection desired."

-Martha Graham

Crying is the Soul's Release

Sometime's everyone just needs a good cry. The topic of the tears isn't important, it's just that you cry and release that energy. Today I had tears of joy, hope, saddness, and ambition. I came home after dropping one of my best friends off at the airport and, without knowing why, burst into tears. Tears raging down my face. Dripping down my pants. Saltyness on my lips. I couldn't hold it back and when I tried to I just ended up crying harder.

I think it's because this year so much has changed. My friends, my family, my life. And sometimes we just wonder if we are making the right decisions. With all the adventures, friends, and choices I had to make this year was it all for the best? But the fact of the matter is that there are no right answers. As long as we are living each day to our best abilities, searching after God, and directly living life then we are doing really well. Better than most. And so you just embrace all the emotions that come with it.

So, I just went ahead, sat back... and let the tears run. Gave them free will over my life.

True: crying is the soul's release

Akunnamatata

Went to go see the Lion King musical last night.

Old rafiki say, the past is painful but you have to embrace it and responde to it. Listen to your heart and follow your soul. It will lead you in the right direction.

And then on days when nothing seems to be going right just say akunnamatata. no worries.

-akuunamatata for today!

laughter, joy, and monkeys!

"write it on your heart that each and every day is the best day of the year."

- Emerson

swinging monkeys!

what do you do when your school of nursing at your University goes on probation?

-email the dean

-call the mom

-start praying you don't have to transfer

Commiting to Goals

A best friend passed along this story to me,

The Viking culture is one of discipline, passion and commitment. As an example, when the Vikings would set out on an expedition, they planned to burn the boat upon arriving at their destination. The purpose was that it forced them to plan ahead of time and make a full-commitment upon arrival. In today's world, we see lots of people (professionals, politicians, academics, etc) suffering from a lack of focus as they sail through life looking at many different islands. Real entrepreneurs act like the Vikings... They aren't afraid to burn the boats, because they believe in the goal and refuse to be distracted.

Make a decision and go with it! Burn the boat and don't look back!

His Glory endures forever!

A little More Trust

Phillipians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Proverbs 12:25 "An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up."

Right now I find myself at a place in life filled with anxious thoughts and general stress.

• Will I find time and be prepared for the upcoming human anatomy exams
• Am I balancing time between family and study load?
• Will I get into the right classes for next semester?
• Should I study abroad or take a semster off?
• Will I be happy with my roomates next year?
• Is my job and work at the American Cancer Society going to balance?

Yet, as I stopped to think about all these stressful questions a few things occured to me. 1. never once before in my life have I ever not found time to study for an exam (well besides maybe one time in BIO 150) 2. as long as I put forth a little effort all of these questions will be answered by forces outside my control. The stress that I had in High School has all been answered and accounted for. I did well on Chem tests. I finished all my work. I got into a good college. I chose a college that I am overally happy with. And so in light of that, this overwhelming feeling of anxiousness that I am currently aware of is pretty worthless. It doesn't do me any good, and in the end it won't get me any farther. Yet why do we cling to it so much? Why is it so hard to choose not to be anxious? It comes so naturally.

Nevertheless, today I will choose to place a little more trust in myself. To speak kinder words to myself. To know it will all be answered with or without anxiousness.

Raising the (chocolate) Bar

It is proven that dark chocolate is filled with antioxidants and essential minerals (including magnesum, copper, potassium, manganese, and most significant flavonoids). Flavonoids, for those of you who aren't nursing majors, helps improve blood-vessel flexibility and prevents hardening of arteries. But the good news doesn't stop there, high percentage of cocoa in dark chocolate gives it a low glycemic index, a ranking of carbohydrates according to their effect on our blood glucose levels. Overall meaning: it helps form red blood cells and utilize iron.

So go ahead, indulge yourself today. Eating healthy never tasted so sweet!

Barefoot and Brainy

Back to sunshine Florida after an Easter weekend at home!

Leave the sandals, I'd rather walk barefoot!

Barefoot and Brainy!

who would have ever thought two words could sum me up so perfectly?

Life's Winds

Home for Easter weekend. Back in my small town, loving all the little things that complete me here. There are many things at home that remind me who I am and what I love.

• I love being a midwest girl (grass, woody pine trees, and wet muddy puddles)
• Chasing around kids in the backyard, playing tag, wearing a warm jacket and hat. Getting out of breathe because the two little boys have more energy then I do. All this while feeling the brisk wind hit my face and turn my cheeks red.
• Sitting on the couch with family. Talking. About jobs, medicine, my cousins. A conversation with them turning into uncontrollable laughter. My family is important.
• Staying up until 11:30 with my best friend. Catching up on my bed for over three hours

But there are also new things that remind me of who I am and what I love at school

• Going out with friends and exploring the city. Art Shows. Restaurants. Beaches. Adventures.
• Being able to come home to my very own apartment, and not having anyone to be accountable to or anyone to take care of. To come home, cook food, light candles, workout, and enjoy my space.
• Passing the ducks and Pelican while walking to class. I'm a nature girl.
• Volunteering with underprivilaged children.
• Studying medicine and nursing

The breezy comforts of home. The winds of independence. Now towards the end of the year the two are learning to mix a little more. So put up the sails, catch the gust, and keep going!

Midnight Billy Joel

She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies,
and she only reveals what she wants you to see
She's hides like a child,
but she's always a woman to me.

Oh-she takes care of herself
She can wait if she wantsShe's ahead of her time
Oh-and she never gives out
And she never gives in
She just changes her mind

She is frequently kind
And she's suddenly cruel
She can do as she pleases
She's nobody's fool
But she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree
And the most she will do
Is throw shadows at you
But she's always a woman to me

Sunshine in the Mail

Recieved a little sunshine in the mail today:

Dearest Heidi,

You have just about made it! I'm so proud!

Summer is waiting for you!

Love, mom

Beach Days

Out at the beach. Sitting on the sand: toes covered and all. Close enough that I can hear, see, smell, and taste the ocean saltyness on my lips. Yet far away enough that I'm not wet and submerged. I smell a cigar. I always enjoyed that smell, but I'm not sure why. Probably reminds me of my own father. I see a dad knee high emersed in a hole of sand, digging a well for his naky two year old little boy. The son who won't remember that great big hole tomorow. The son who is more content sitting in his own little puddle of water. But the father endlessly digs at the hole nonetheless. It's not about tomorow, it's all about the fun the son and father had today.

I wish we as adults could always think like that. Our efforts our not about making lasting impressions or building something that will last forever. It's just about going out of our way to make someone happy no matter what. It's all about having fun today. Right here. Right now.

PS. I also think this is how God interacts with us. He builds and does things for us even if we don't take notice. While we are more happy playing in our little puddles, the Father calls us to splash in his HUGE hole of adventure. Also, God endlessly goes out of his way for us to make us smile. God wants to have fun with us : ) He desires to spoil and play with us like the father wanted to play and build the best hole for his little boy.